Dear Pulse,
I’m sorry, however I’ve to start out in pidgin English. I really feel so silly, “Na me see werey (a mad person) talk say I like her.”
So, the factor is that this babe I’ve preferred for some time instructed me I’m okay and he or she likes me too, however the one pink flag I’ve is I’m a very good man and he or she needs somebody poisonous, somebody who would insult, manhandle, discuss to her like she’s a no one, impregnate, and beat her up.
She mentioned if I’m not a poisonous particular person, she is not accessible. She demanded that I do all this stuff, however I refused.
I attempted to persuade her that toxicity will not be love, neither is it tips on how to assert masculinity and management in a relationship.
I instructed her that she wanted to expertise a unique form of love and that marrying a poisonous man would solely get her killed each emotionally and bodily.
I’ve beneficial books for her to learn as a result of I really feel like she suffered rejection whereas rising up; that is why she’s like this, however she is hell-bent on me being a poisonous man. What do I do?
Dear Emeka,
I’m joyful you recognize that toxicity isn’t love and also you recognise her points would possibly stem from her childhood.
A relationship will not be an avenue so that you can play therapist or attempt to ‘fix’ your accomplice. She has deep-seated points you may’t assist her with; regardless of how a lot you’re keen on or like her. What she wants is a licensed therapist.
Never succumb to her strain to deal with her roughly or inflict bodily harm on her; it is 100% unsuitable, and it could possibly change into extra harmful than you would ever anticipate.
Perhaps you would possibly profit from some area from her since she has made it clear she needs a poisonous man and you are not that.